Sunday, May 18, 2014

Another day in this reality...

I'm sitting in the tall cool grass next to my son's grave watching the sun set.  talk about surreal.

The bird are chirping and I can hear the scampering of squirrels in the branches above me.  A hawk wad circling for a bit, but then headed across the street to the river.

When I pulled up, a grieving daughter was lying on her dad's grave sobbing.  I admit to being annoyed.  I wanted to visit CJ, but she was right next to him.  I gave her some time and space after realizing grief isn't a competition.  The rules are unrealistic and the pain is real. 

So here I sit.  Dreading the approaching darkness that will bring our time together to an end for today.  Bewildered that this is my life, and heartbroken. 

Missing my sweet little boy....

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